more than a woman

a correspondence

Coworker: if someone is "more than a woman to me," what are they exactly? name that song and get that answer.

Edgy: Umm . . . it's "More Than a Woman."

Iguana Sam: Would she be a godess? And that sounds a lot like the Billy Joel song "Always a Woman"

Coworker: i meant, name that group. ;) but smart deduction.

Edgy: It's also the BeeGees.

Coworker: but you didn't answer the question part---what is a woman that is more than a woman?

Edgy: No. Your original instructions clearly indicated that if I name that song, I will get that answer. I'm waiting for you to give me the answer.

Coworker: oh, i guess i'm not content communcating. ;) i'm looking for someone to tell me. when i'm more than a woman i'm pregnant--which i've never been--so i'm wondering if that's the hidden message.

Iguana Sam: Maybe it's referring to female conjoined twins (eg., on Big Fish). That would make more sense...more than a woman = two women ;)

Edgy: In a patriarchal society, a man is more than a woman.

Coworker: a man is gonna die in a minute.

Iguana Sam: Likewise, during the former Monday Night Football, man is inebriated more than a woman.

Coworker: man is inebriated on the illusions of his grandeur....humph!

Edgy: According to Google search "is more than a woman":

• The Crawford of the postwar, post-Metro years is more than a woman; she's an institution.
  
• Zsazsa Zaturnah is more than a woman.
  
• when Troilus says that Helen is more than a woman, she is "a theme of honor and renown" (III.ii199), Hector yields and agrees to continue the war.
  
• A man is more than a woman.
  
• To me a lady is more than a woman, it takes no special skills to be a woman, just a different sperm crossed the finish first.
  
• jenna is more than a woman

Coworker: mmmm.. good thing you found all that, because otherwise you were implying that the BeeGees were gay. (singing a love song to more than a woman---the woman being a man). or there could have been a cross-dressing thing going on (tight white pants, flowy hair). i'm thinking we've got a press release forming here.

Edgy: The BeeGees are from the 70s; everyone was gay back then.

Coworker: ;) happy. that was a fun and creepy convo---i think i'm putting that in my book........

Edgy: Not if I blog about it first . . .

Coworker: i call copyright. Iguana Sam---you are witness.

Edgy: Too bad.

Iguana Sam [referencing the Google message]: Lol!

Edgy: Iguana Sam, you're behind. You need to catch up with the convo . . . ;)

Iguana Sam: I know, I step away for one second to do some work, and I'm an infinty behind.

Iguana Sam: And yes, I think Coworker does have copyright on this convo, since she did start it and all. Although Edgy could claim Bro. Anything Goes Al rights and usurp any copyright to anything that anyone's ever had.

Edgy: So I still win is what you're saying.

Iguana Sam: Techincally no, but practically yes, and definitely not if you're talking about publishing it as resonating fictional nonfiction.

Edgy: Hmm. I still think I win.

Coworker: no, what he's saying is that you'd resort to illegality to use my words---my words! I'm more than a woman afterall, you don't want to mess with me.

Iguana Sam: Heed her advice...don't mess with More Than a Woman.

Edgy: Do we have a new blog name for Coworker?

Iguana Sam: That would be awesome!

Coworker: if Other Nickname comes into this---you're in so big of trouble.

Edgy: I want to do that more than you know.

Coworker: which reminds me---i set you up for the best slam and you missed it. ;) member how i noted that "being more than a woman is being pregnant"? and just now i said not to mess with me because i was more than a woman? you so missed the perfect rounding out of your weekly hypothesisatory accusation.

Edgy: I chose to ignore it to go after bigger fish. :)

Coworker: are you calling me fat?

Edgy: Not my words.

Iguana Sam: Edgy's pulled off the gauntlets.

Iguana Sam: (Iguana Sam walks up into the bleachers and has a seat as Coworker and Edgy start kickboxing.)

an addendum to the conversation

Coworker to TexMom: You can read everything I sent you on Edgy's blog. Crook.

TexMom: He has no morals. We knew that when Manager hired him. We should've spoken up.

(Hey, if I already have no morals, what's to stop me from getting on Coworker's computer and forwarding myself the correspondence?)